1.Sometimes we want to show you that we’ve changed. – Men go through or think they go through a transformation to a better person while they have been away from you.

2. Sometimes we want to see whether or not you’ve changed. – We want to see if you have change physically or mentally.

3. Sometimes we’re just being manipulative. –  men want to see if he still has it or has the power to affect you.

4. Sometimes, we realize what we’ve lost and are ready to be whatever we need to be to get it back – This  is called the crawling back stage ” this is one of the most popular ones” lol!!

Red Flag #1: He drives a big flashy car and lives in a fly apartment – the one he calls a “condo” – in the ritzy part of town, but his furniture consists of a futon and one flat screen television. Okay, if he moved in last Saturday, then we can give him a pass, but if he’s a grown man and he’s been there longer than 30 days with no real furniture, chances are he’s not the baller you thought he was. The only thing worse would be him living in a fully furnished home. . . with his mama!

Red Flag #2: When you met him, he was buying out the bar at the club. But, everytime you come to that empty apartment/”condo,” his refrigerator is just as bare with the exception of the Arm & Hammer Baking Soda he uses to keep the ice fresh. Be leery of anyone who is so concerned about impressing complete strangers on Saturday night, he’ll starve for the rest of the week.

Red Flag #3: Have you ever seen him get his mail out of the mailbox? If you answered “No,” be concerned. He can’t be in control of his finances if he’s ignoring his mail. Someone who has their finances together won’t want to run the risk of missing something important. On the flip side, if he does get the mail, but the contents are always pastel colored envelopes that read “URGENT” or “PAST DUE” across the front, you should still be concerned. That is a pretty standard clue that someone is having trouble paying their bills on time.

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But what if he has held back, waiting for the moment in which you’re too infatuated to care, or naive enough to think a shocking revelation won’t impact your new relationship?

For those sisters who are politically-minded, a difficult hurdle to cross often comes with the late announcement that your new man is about to vote red or blue when you vote the other way.

I know personally that I’ve had received the odd figurative slap-in-the-face when political alliances are revealed that go against my own. This is not to say that I don’t understand our differences, simply that I begin to wonder just how far one vote can translate into day-to-day social beliefs. Name one and I wonder about it!

Terms Of Endearment: How Much Is Too Much?

Again, many girlfriends of mine regularly talk of life on the dating scene and just how accurate their first impressions are. Intuition, they say! But most, if not all, get caught out when they overhear their new man talking to his boys either about booty, getting freaky with YOU and, worst of all, any mention of that girl you know he used to date.

Some women can overcome such talk and put it down to the pressures of being a man and wanting to fit in, while others amongst us think it’s wrong, unnecessary and straight-out disrespectful. At the end of the day, the week or the month you take to deal with it, if you feel comfortable that his sexual attitudes won’t eventually impact your bond with him, go for it sister!

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Now one situation that is often always waiting for us down the line is the moment you take him home to Mom, Dad, Grandma, your Uncle, your Aunt, your sister and some, if not all, of your 17 cousins.

You of course have already subconsciously established who you’re close to, and who you try to avoid at those oversized family gatherings. But what happens when he lets slip that he doesn’t like someone in your family and that he would prefer not to see him/her/them too often?

Some women assume that in family matters a man will bite his tongue and deal with it, except maybe if one of your nasty, middle-aged cousins was giving him dirty looks across the dinner table. Unfortunately (yet perhaps fortunately for the sake of honesty in your relationship) not all men remain quiet.

From family to family this is bound to vary based on factors like how much time you spend with your family, how many streets away they live and just how tech-saavy your Grandma might be with her new iPod including being able to keep an eye on you and your man on BlackPlanet.

When it comes down to it a relationship is a complicated process and often there’s no definite end to the ‘getting-to-know-him’ stage. But time will tell, as they say, so let’s hope for your sake that time says ‘Yes!’

What are some of the experiences you’ve had with getting to know the ins-and-outs of your man and his opinions?

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This is for the fellas who have been dating a chick for a while and every time they think they are getting somewhere she tears it all down. You think it is something that you are doing but guess what? You probably did nothing wrong. Women know after a short time of meeting a man how far they want the relationship to go. If she is committing these 10 acts on a regular then Sorry Patna, she just isn’t that into you.

1. She calls you Irregularly

Calls from her are sporadic. You may not hear from her for 2 weeks and then…. Ring and ding-ding baby. Your special lady gives you a warm shout out and you end up taking her out to eat that night. Shrimp and lobster on you buddy. Or you end up driving her around all day to run her errands etc…She is keeping you around for a reason and it isn’t because she likes your smile and bubbly personality.

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2. Quick Phone Convos

Her conversations with you on the phone are always quick. Contrary to men, women are usually phone talkers. So if she consistently hops off the phone with you abruptly, it is probably because she does not enjoy talking to you that much.

3. You have never been in her house

You have been dating her for a few months and she has never invited you in once. Not even for a bottle of water. You tell her that you have to use the bathroom and she tells you that there is a gas station up the street. She does not want to let you into her inner sanctum. She does not really want to let you into her life.

4. You never met her friends

When a chick is into a guy or at least thinks he is yummy eye candy, she will want to show him off to her girls at least once. In this case, if you have been dating her and… To Read The Rest Go To YeahSheSaidIt

We all know breakups are hard to deal with, you’ve invested a lot of time and energy and you just can’t see yourself getting past the hurt. One of the things you MUST do is to stop all forms of communication. If you’re at that point where you’re ready to move on, here are some tips from blackvoices.com to get you over that hump.

1. Baby, I’m Begging

The whole “he broke up with me out of the blue” speech is pure BS. Whether you noticed or not, chances are your ex saw the demise of your relationship well before you did. Therefore, groveling before him won’t change his mind. Despite what you think, desperation is never hot. Wipe the tears and snot off your face and walk away with some dignity!

2. LOL

Just because you can call, text, BBM, IM and e-mail anyone at anytime these days doesn’t mean you’ve got the green light to do all of the above to your ex. Texting him to say “I was just thinking of you” is no longer romantic or sweet, it’s annoying –and stalker-esque. Do yourself a solid and avoid using your phone or computer when thoughts of your ex start bubbling over — sober or drunk.

READ THE REST HERE

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“We’ve Been Together For Nine Months, But He’s Hardly Around!”

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Women are always complaining about how their man refuses to open up to them and show his emotions. There are hundreds of articles given advice to women about how to make your man feel comfortable with sharing with you and so on. There is little help for the brotha who has found the woman of his dreams and she refuses to open up to him emotionally. He does everything he can to show her that he loves her and that he is trustworthy but she refuses to be open. Here are a few reasons why this woman is unwilling or even unable to be express her emotions

1. She hasn’t made her mind up about you yet
Most women have a defense mechanism up in the early stages of dating. If you have been dating a woman for considerable time period and you see that she insists on keeping those same walls up it might be because she has not yet decided how she feels about you. She may still be mulling over whether she is prepared to get serious with you. She may be deciding whether or not you fit the description of someone that she wants to deal with romantically.

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2. She has been hurt before, and before that..
If she has a brick wall up between you and her then chances are it is because she has been hurt by other men in the past. I say men because most women’s hearts do not automatically become cold after one incident with a bad boyfriend. It usually takes more than one negative experience before she hardens.

3. She may have deeper issues than you know
If you have been with your woman for an extended amount of time and still sense that she has barricades around herself then there may be deeper issues. Issues that have absolutely nothing to do with you. Perhaps she was abused by a male figure in her life whom she trusted, or has Daddy issues etc.. There is a huge chance that her issues have nothing to do with you or your relationship but more so with whatever is going on in her head and her heart that she has not dealt with.

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4. It may not be in her nature
It is stereotyped that all women are emotional creatures that enjoy sitting and discussing their feelings and thoughts. Wrong. Not every woman is going to be like that naturally. Some women may be more distant. This could be because of the way she was raised, or it could just be her personality. It could have nothing to do with you. She probably behaved the same way in every relationship she has ever been in.

5. She generally does not trust men.
Some women are taught from birth by other women in their lives not to trust men. Their mothers and aunts and sisters were treated badly by men or experienced some form of abuse and they teach their daughters, to protect themselves. To always be strong and to never trust men because it will only lead to hurt and pain. This also applies to women who have no outline for a healthy relationship. Women who have never seen another woman involved in a healthy relationship with a man. They may not feel that it is possible and assume that at some point the man they love will flick a switch internally in him and abandon her.

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There are several miscommunications and misunderstandings that occur between men and women daily. Some are avoidable and some are never ending. Check out the 5 most common misconceptions men have about women.

1. As much as he may try to empathize, he knows nothing about how you feel when you are on your period. For obvious reasons he never will. The most he can do is try to make you as comfortable as possible. For the ladies who have a man who at least is willing to TRY, appreciate him for that because some guys don’t.

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2. Why your girlfriends can call you bitch but he can’t. Sometimes women use the word “bitch” in a jokingly fashion among their female friends. However, if your man dare calls you that then there will be repercussions. Some men feel that if you let your home girls say it then why should you get so upset if he does? Logically this makes sense because both sets of people are using the same word. However, for some women the intention behind it matters more to them.

3. Why we feel the need to be so close to him. We want to know everything about our man. From his favorite foods to his dislikes, to how he is feeling on a day to day basis. Most men do not require that much emotional coddling. However, once a woman falls in love, she wants to be close to her man and get to know him extensively because she find comfort in the intimacy.

4. Why you keep a special eye out on his female friends. It has nothing to do with you not trusting him. It has more to do with you knowing how some women operate. Sometimes they can have a male friend and it can be platonic and then unexpectedly, something happens where they start looking at him “differently”. Most women are always on the look out for this type of reaction. Why shouldn’t she be? Obviously she sees something special in you. Wouldn’t it be safe to say that another woman would as well?

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5. Why you feel the need to talk to that one girlfriend about your issues. There is always at least one friend that every woman opens up to and sometimes discusses the issues she has with her man with. She may not tell her friend EVERYTHING and I would suggest that you do not. However, this friend is her shoulder to cry on when her man is acting like an ass. She is the person that she vents to. Some guys don’t understand the importance of this friend and why their woman talks about him to her. He may also assume that the friend is constantly bad mouthing him and in some cases she might be. For that reason he may feel uncomfortable with your relationship.

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How do they do it? While we may give a lot of flack to Hollywood’s finest for the comparatively short shelf lives of their romantic relationships, we know that they face trials and tribulations in coupling that the average person does not. Not only does their partnership face constant scrutiny from the prying eyes of the press, but their jobs dictate they will spend a significant amount of time apart on film sets across the country and around the world.

One actress flew 11 hours every Friday to see her husband; another used Skype to talk “face-to-face” to her boyfriend over the computer.

One athlete used texts to communicate with his girlfriend; another couple bought homes in two different countries.

Find out who’s who over at PopEater.

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We don’t mind men thinking we’re unfashionable (what do they know) but ‘easy’? That’s another matter.

I guess we have to be careful we don’t give out false messages.

Take a look at the list and see if you agree…SOURCE

1) The ‘Bodycon’ Dress – 57%

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2) Crop Tops- 53%

3) Corset Tops- 51%

4) Lace – 45%

5) ‘Underwear as Outerwear’ – 43%

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6) Pencil Skirts – 38%

7) Knee-High Boots – 32%

Stiletto High Heels – 29%

9) Mini Skirts – 22%

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Click through the gallery to see some celebs wearing these supposed Fashion Dont’s: